Reciprocity: Leveraging Social Constructs to Further Christ's Kingdom

Having the right tools to take on a difficult job makes all the difference in the world. Whether it’s using a miter chop-saw to cut crown molding or crafting the right combinations of formulas and macros to do financial reporting in Excel, having more tools (both sharp and ready) to apply to the task at hand can alleviate much of the stress involved. As followers of Christ, we constantly look to add tools to our belt to help us better serve our King, and He graciously provides! I'd like to suggest that He has given us a tool embedded in our social interactions, one we may not even realize is available to us - a little tool called reciprocity.
Reciprocity is an exchange between two entities or, put another way, a cyclical give-and-take. Let me ask a question, if someone were to take you out to lunch and cover your bill, would you feel inclined to pay for theirs at the next lunch? I certainly would, and more likely than not, they would want to do so again, and it's easily repeatable. Reciprocity is a social convention that establishes and strengthens relationships, and because it is deeply ingrained in our society, we can use it to leverage opportunities to share the Gospel!

Reciprocity In Action:
Christ tells us in Matthew 5:16 “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” By reflecting Christ's goodness and graciousness through our good works, we initiate a reciprocal relationship, aiming ultimately to redirect focus to God and His glory.
When we do our neighbor an unsolicited favor or cover a stranger's coffee tab, they may be more inclined to hear why we would be willing to do such a nice thing. They intuitively understand that social conventions demand acknowledgment of the good deed. More importantly, they become curious and even pre-disposed to like us and hear what our motivation is. Reciprocity can foster the opportunity we are seeking to evangelize! How often is a door warmly opened with a recipient ready to focus on what we have to say? Reciprocity sets a relationship of goodwill in motion with Christ at its center - is there any better basis for a relationship than that? It is as simple as taking a meal to someone in need, mowing a neighbor's lawn, or shoveling their snowy driveway - simple actions that are purpose-driven to further Christ's kingdom for God's glory. In summary, we offer goodwill and works, which they may reciprocate by giving appreciation and acknowledgment, which we joyfully redirect to the God who saved us.

Redirecting Attention and Changing Minds:
So, how do we properly redirect attention from ourselves to the Lord? I would suggest leaning into Titus 3:5, “He saved us, not by works which we did in righteousness, but according to His mercy, through the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit.” Having engaged others through reciprocity, we have a prime opportunity to address the pervasive misconception held by many: that salvation is earned. We have all heard it, and our society believes deeply that God's favor can be earned. We can use texts like this and Ephesians 2:8-10 to clarify that we are not saved through good works, we are saved only through faith given by God's grace for the purpose of good works.

Dangers Of Misuse:
Like anything, in our sinful state we are prone to misuse or abuse reciprocity. Undoubtedly, practicing reciprocity is loaded with spiritual danger, especially if our good deeds aim to draw attention to ourselves. In that case, we have our meager, temporal reward in full (Matt 6:2). Similarly, if we fail to be prepared to give an account of our hope with the appropriate gentleness and respect, we may miss the opportunity we've worked so hard to initiate (1 Peter 3:15). Finally if we start keeping tally of good deeds or expecting others to owe us, we risk losing sight of our true purpose: furthering Christ’s kingdom, not our own. These risks are real and must be understood and prepared for. However, with prayerful preparation, I am confident that these temptations and obstacles can be overcome (1 Cor 10:13).

Ultimately, this post has aimed to reinvigorate our use of every word, thought, and deed to foster glory to God (1 Corinthians 10:31). When we steward ordinary interactions, we begin looking for opportunities where we previously thought there were none, and we begin to love God and our neighbors not just with our words but with our entire being, as Luke 10:27 says:

“And he answered and said, ‍“YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR STRENGTH, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND, AND YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF."

Reciprocity is simply another ready-made tool for the task of carrying out the Great Commission and furthering the kingdom all the while directing glory to God and away from ourselves. May God find us all faithfully serving Him with every tool which He has supplied and may He bring about much fruit by His grace.